HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

You can choose India to live your life in or you can choose foreign, you can choose some metro city like Delhi or Mumbai or some small town, but others’ opinions and judgements are something you can never run away from. And what’s ironic is that you can’t save yourself from these judgements even if you do everything, they expect you to do because then they will find something else to judge you on. That’s why, today I am not going to share with you how to stop people from passing on judgements instead I will share with you few tips on how to not let people’s words get to you and how to not let things get to your head. 

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU?

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

Ever since I could handle some maturity, my parents have told me to never knowingly hurt others, but I took it their lesson in another way and I stopped taking my emotions into consideration and I let others’ emotions and expectations control my life. But I was not happy that way. Doing things that others would expect me to and others would not pass judgement on left a very narrow path to walk on and even then, others would find something wrong with the path I have chosen and then I realized that nothing I do will matter to them. They will always find something to judge me on. So, it’s no use to stay unhappy and constrict yourself in the meaningless restrictions that others’ expectations have put on you. 
That’s why please take the next few tips into considerations when you feel that you are giving too much of yourself to others. 

DISCOVER YOURSELF

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

The first step in not letting others emotions and expectations affect you or burden you is to figure out what you are feeling at any moment and what you expect from yourself and your life. When I had just passed my 10th and the time came to choose one among the three main streams (Science, Commerce, and Arts) I let my parents’ expectations persuade me into taking Science and that only happened because I wasn’t sure what I wanted from my life. 
I would suggest you to widen your horizon, travel, read biographies of inspiring personalities, meditate and then do introspection on what your dreams are, what are you passionate about and what do you like to do. 

YOU ARE THE CENTER OF YOUR UNIVERSE

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

Do you think any incident in your life stop the Earth from rotating or makes it rotate faster? No, it doesn’t. What happens to us affect only us and people who love us and care about us. Those people who had judged you on your life choices, just because you are slightly different from them, neither do they get sad in your bad times, nor do they celebrate your happiness so why for even one moment let others bring you down. Your happiness and your sadness should always be about you and your loved ones not someone you don’t even know well. Because always remember you are the sun of your solar-system and everything should revolve around you.

DON’T MEASURE YOUR SELF-WORTH THROUGH SOMEONE ELSE’S MEASUREMENT SCALE

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

It often happens, we think we are looking good if others think we are looking good, we are successful if people around us consider us successful and we are happy if others think we are happy. In fact, knowingly or un-knowingly we make all our life goals and life plans, according to what others would think of the results we will get from those goals and plans. And later on, when those plans and goals don’t make us happy, we realize that we have given others too much power over ourselves. 
We should know that others measurement is according to the life they have lived, according to the struggle they have gone through and according to their perception of world, but no two people are same then how can their life, their struggles and their attitude toward world can ever be same. And if we aren’t same then why are we seeing the world and ourselves through others’ eyes. 

EMOTIONAL DETACHMENT

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

I often used to let others’ words get to myself and let others affect my mood. I would hear that someone I considered my friend was badmouthing about me behind my back because they didn’t like something about me, or I would hear some office gossip that is totally not based on truth and all these things used to make me upset or angry with myself and others. I began to lose my inner peace due to no fault of mine and then I realized that if these things are not my fault then why am I letting them affect me so much. Why am I so attached to others opinion about myself that I am letting others destroy my inner peace? Then, slowly I began to detach myself from others’ opinion and judgement and started to surround myself with positive people. 
In my opinion inner peace and happiness are two things that we should always try to gain. These should be out goal and our plan should be how to get them and keep them permanently. Emotional detachment from unnecessary drama can help you with that. 

POSITIVE ATTITUDE AND POSITIVE PEOPLE ARE KEY TO HAPPINESS

HOW TO NOT LET OTHERS AFFECT YOU

Start to look at things positively. It sometimes happens that we get so habitual of negative judgements from others that we even take positive and healthy criticism as negative opinion but it shouldn’t be like that. We should discuss our issues with the other person and try to understand their point of view because if we don’t do that, we will be similar to the negative people we should stay away from. 
And try to surround yourself with positive people who will try to understand you before judging you and your actions. 

CONCLUDING SECTION

The most effective mantra of not letting others affect you is that you should learn to let it go. Always remember that people will find something to pass judgement on and you can’t teach them to not do that so you will have to prepare yourself to dust those opinions off of you and rise from them. Discover what makes you happy because happiness is the goal. I hope you stay happy, healthy and try to read more and more books.